Restrooms -Sign of Our Times

It’s not about gender, or sexual perversion.

It’s not even about restrooms. It is thinly disguised oppression. I really hope the feature image is satire. For the way society is heading now, it doesn’t feel like I’m too far off from that being a reality.

Every gender, sexual, racial group, nationality -excluding the dominant white male- have experienced segregation and oppression. What it all comes down to are inherent rights as inhabitants of Earth. As human beings. However, once there is fear projected by one group onto another group, that has the effect of governments stepping in to enact laws. Now, these laws are designed to protect the dominant group, regardless of how asinine they are, who they ostracize, or what the negative repercussions are on the subservient group.

I agree with the laws protecting my right to use the lavatory, restroom, facilities, bathroom in relative safety. I mean, I wouldn’t want to knowingly share any space with a sociopath, murderer, psychopath, sexual predator. Quite possibly, I cannot believe anybody would. But none of these ‘Lavatory Laws’ protect anyone from that confrontation.


I am a transgender female, NOT a sociopath, murderer, psychopath, nor sexual predator. Please do not treat me as though I am. Simply because I am gender dysphoric, DO NOT include me, nor any of my trans -sisters or -brothers, in the above categories. Being transgender is not being a deviant. It is simply being.

And that begs another point. It seems all of this negative attention on bathroom use is relegated to trans-females. Why is that? Trans-females are just as aware of their surroundings as are cis-gender females. I’d argue even more so. Truth is that historically, there have been MORE attacks and slayings of transgender females, then of sexual-inappropriateness, in female restrooms. Why don’t we focus on protecting our right to walk down the street, enjoy a cocktail with friends, go to college, et cetera, without fear of being hospitalized or worse? I digress….


The reality is that transgender individuals are hyper-alert for fear of being ‘clocked’ that the last thing we want to do is call attention to ourselves. That fear is so all-encompassing, that all we do is, find the nearest open stall, ensconce ourselves within the security of the flimsy metal frame, do what all women do in a stall, then collect ourselves, wash our hands -we are ladies after all- and exit toward the nearest shoe sale.

I get there is a sense of ownership inherent in being private in public. A sense of security within a familiar group or surroundings. Individuals who do not have gender dysphoria, who know they are born as either male or female and live their life accordingly, are used to a certain set of expectations. When these expectations are challenged or compromised, the “fight or flight” response is activated. Here is where an unfounded fear takes over. Education and understanding will win out and it is happening, but at a snail’s pace.

To dispel the notion that there are some universal secrets hidden in the catacombs of the ladies lavatories, that is not the case. We do have the occasional excessively long line, the comfortable couch, a fragrance or two, feminine products…toilet paper and soap.

And if there are still hesitations and furtive feelings, then lets put this in perspective. Male and female residents of Ancient Rome would use public restrooms(bathhouses) together. They freely talked politics, religion, laughed, debated and oh yes, peed and crapped. And in lieu of modern day toilet paper, Romans used communal ‘sponge-on-a-stick’ tools to clean themselves afterwards.

They also depicted the Goddess Fortuna, Goddess of chance, luck and fate, in many bath houses. This ‘Guardian Angel’ looked over those using the facility, protecting them from demons thought to be lurking in the bowls. Now our demons have emerged and taken the form of bigotry and discrimination.

Flash forward 2,000 years. The UPC(Uniform Plumbing Code) is developed. This collective is solely responsible for segregating male and female restrooms. This was done out of health reasons, not gender separation. At the turn of the century, infectious diseases were on the rise. Circa 1925, the decision to separate men’s and women’s restrooms was borne out of the intent to cut down and eliminate public transmission of disease. Since gender dysmorphia is NOT a disease, there is nothing to worry about for sharing restroom facilities with a trans-person identifying as female or male.

I hope that clears everything up.

mir, irini, peace, amn,