New Study Suggests the Robot Sex Revolution Is Overhyped. SHOCK!

Who really wants to bang a robot? A new study has the numbers.

It seems every third article on the internet is about a new robot brothel opening up in Amsterdam. Or a new robot sex service starting up. Maybe it's part of Net Neutrality that everyone reports on people doinking robots. I don't know. Net Neutrality is still super confusing to me. Let's just put it this way: Everyone appears to be fascinated with sex-bots. Hell, I'm writing this, so I'm guilty too!

There is definitely a "What's up with that?" factor at play. Probably the same instinct that compels us to look at car crashes or nude beaches. It's odd, it's a bit puzzling, and when sex is involved? You almost have to look! So here we are. Another article about sex and robots. But with some answers to the big questions like, "Who would actually DO it?" and, "How many people actually WANT to bang a Bot?" Turns out, not many.

Social psychologist and sexpert author, Dr. Justin Lehmiller, is a Research Fellow at Indiana University's Kinsey Institute. He just released his data on this subject. He polled 4,000 Americans about their sexual fantasies for his new book Tell Me What You Want. Part of his survey asked if participants have ever fantasized about sex with a robot, and the numbers wouldn't suggest that there's a real demand for robot sex brothels. Here's what some of the results were:

10.7% of women said they've fantasized about sex with a robot, while 17% of dudes reported they've had fantasies about it. As a dude, I find this number crazy low. Maybe the keyword is "Fantasy". Cause I have definitely seen some hot robot girls in movies and video games and thought, "I'd tag that." Now am I driving around town fantasizing about it? No. But if Scarlett Johansson from Ghost in the Shell crawls in my bed? Are you kidding? HA! Sign me up!

But we are a long, long way from Blade Runner or Ghost in the Shell level bots. Because that level of cyborg could get dressed, make a sandwich and drive herself home. That's the dream. Somebody tell me when we have THAT. The way things are now aren't very appealing. I don't find myself fantasizing about picking up a 120 pound hunk of latex and circuits, trying to get it in the shower right after we've doinked. That's actually the stuff of nightmares. I'm actually disturbed right now, just thinking about it. Not even close to a fantasy.

According to the study, if people ARE having robot sex fantasies, they are infrequent at best. Just 1.2% of women and 1.4% of men said they thought about banging a bot "often." So you might want to hold off on investing in that Vegas robot brothel. It doesn't sound like many people are into it.

Maybe it's the current level of tech. Maybe people just don't want to screw a robot. Or just maybe, people want sex with a real person. Maybe we're all hopeless romantics that want a real connection to another real human being that's just as lost and lonely as we are. A brief moment of shared physical tenderness and emotion. A light in the darkness between two hearts, souls and bodies. Maybe THAT'S it.

But when somebody invents the "Ghost in Shell 2000?" TAKE MY MONEY!! I am gonna go full on porn star! WOOOOOO!! Not proud. Just sayin'. It's a robot. No harm, no foul. Right?