Remember back in February when you didn’t want to be alone on Valentine’s Day, so you impulsively asked out that talkative neighbor who you found out too late collects vintage medical oddities?
How about over Spring Break, when what you thought was true love turned out to just be the effect of two-for-one beer-ritas and whatever was in those really chewy brownies?
Now it's April and you’re staring across the table at the result of your lack of discretion, impulse control, and class. To be honest that “decision” is likely looking back at you with the same thoughts, thinking of clever ways to cut you loose (hopefully some that don't involve actual cutting).
It’s time for a break-up, but you need a good soundtrack. Here here are five of my favorite breakup songs for those who are ready to shut the front door on a bad relationship with rhythm an style:
“God Will” by Lyle Lovett
We all want to be able to forget and forgive. Riiiight! Lyle Lovett nailed this one with the honest truth that we’re all too human when it comes to dealing with someone who has done us wrong.
“Pray for You” by Jaron and the Long Road to Love
If the chance of forgiveness is a bit out of the question, there’s always the power of prayer. Let that ex know they will still be on your mind, or living rent free in your brain.
“Take A Bow” by Rihanna
If anyone deserved a good “screw you” to bad rubbish, it’s Rihanna. But unfortunately the abusive Rihanna/Chris Brown saga still had some weird chapters after this song was written. The sultry love tone mixed with some pretty vengeful lyrics, however, is priceless.
“Grab your clothes and get gone…You better hurry up, before the sprinklers come on.”
Rihanna is good company. There are plenty of women who know how to break up, and it isn’t always pretty. Check out Pink’s “So What,” Taylor Swift’s “We Are Never Getting Back Together,” Carrie Underwood’s “Before He Cheats,” Kelly Clarkson’s “Since You’ve Been Gone," and the always popular Gloria Gaynor anthem “I Will Survive” for starters.
“I Used to Love Her” by Guns N’ Roses
This one comes with a “don’t try this at home” warning, boys and girls. Yes, it feels great to sing along with “I had to put her six feet under,” but keep it in your boom box. This is the “Tell Tale Heart” of break ups, with the caveat… “I used to love her but I had to kill her….and I can still hear her complain.”
Instead, try this alternative suggested by fans, “I used to love her, but I had tequila.”
“It’s A Beautiful Day” by Michael Bublé
Finally, why do breakup songs always have to be so sad and angry? Sometimes, it just feels good to get your life back, and Bublé does it with unparalleled enthusiasm. Yup, you’ve broken up and it’s all unicorns and rainbows, at least until the summer.